KITTEN TALK 23: Shifting Perspective
Good Evening Kittens,
I say that cause I was writing this at night and not really sure when I’ll post it but doubt during the day it would of been up.
How are y’all doing ? How y’all feeling?
It’s 11/11 as I wrote this and I was having issues with my computer about to give up when I remember I can write these on my phone lol. So I said fuck it and hopped back in instead of hitting my dab pen and reading until I knock out. And I really wanted to get this out.
If you’re not aware already , 11/11 is one of the those super important super cool days to manifest. And I was sitting here reflecting and thinking about my life and what I want out of this journey until I depart this Earth.
In particular there was a situation I had a few days back when I went out with a friend for her birthday vacay and we stood out late to hang out at this super fun karaoke bar. Honestly it was one of the best nights we had and we didn’t get back home until like 6 am ( which I went straight to bed)
But that night I was getting ( and they were too) lots of attention from the men there, getting free drinks and weed , and we were all singing and dancing and giving out it was real nice. I gave my Instagram to a few cute guys cause I ain’t weak you look good you look good okayyyy.
Anyways I want to say a day or so after that night ( the men walked us to the train) I got a DM from one of them.
Now Ion want to hear “ oh Brianna you’re being messy” I’m just explaining what happened and how I felt and decided to do about it.
So ofcourse on my personal Instagram I have a link to my business and my bio says “ S£X Coach” among other random stuff ( to give background)
So he starts the conversation asking about what I’m up to , where I’m from , he liked our vibe when we talked etc I’m like cool.
And when he asked about work I said how I work but my focus is my business and he asks about that and I say I’m a sex coach.
And this is where it goes downhill. He starts to say stuff along the lines of how I must be an “ expert “ and how I’ll take him back to his sexual prime.
In my head and what I write is “ you know sex coaching is not the same as sex work ? Lol” cause bitch he gotta be joking. And yeah some people may not know but to go in that direction ? I also suggested he reads my blog post to learn more about me and what I do.
His response is “ fuck the blog post “ LITERALLY.
And continues on this delusion that I’m going to sex him up and we can do features together? I’m like what that mean.
At that point I was over it and uninterested. Nothing wrong with sex work, I love my onlyfans girlies , but it was more so the sense of audacity and entitlement he had to think I’ll teach him all these sex secrets and to treat my work like that.
And I tried not to take it personally but it did upset me someone didn’t want to take the time to get to know me and had this weird entitlement to my body and disrespect my work. I started to go into this loop again of being afraid to tell men what I do because they will have reactions/ thoughts like that and treat me a certain way. Basically feeling shame and wanting to hide away.
I wanted to shift this because I don’t want to live in shame of what I am genuinely interested in and do to help women around the world. I don’t want to be in fear that people will treat me like just a sex object or someone they can just play around with. This work heals me also from societal conditioning about us women and our sexuality.
So I processed the underlying shame I still had about my genuine interest in sex / sexual health and well being. I worked through the idea not all men think with their dicks and speak with that. Be more open to the belief I can say what I do without the fear of a man judging me or making crude remarks.
And funny enough , another guy I met that night DM me. And we talked about the songs I sang at the bar ( yeah bitch I did like 4 songs absolutely crossfaded) and he said how much he liked those songs. And when he asked what I do , I told him I’m a sex coach.
And he thought it was really interesting , I told him what my goals are and he thought it was cool and we talked about how we don’t agree with the sex education system we had in school and how that’s a disservice to human health and sexuality.
And I felt really comfortable telling him this and he didn’t make any weird sexual remarks. I mean yeah there was underlining attraction there but it wasn’t disrespectful at all. So that showed me there is always someone who will respect me. I can be proud of what I do without judgement or shame or that I have to hide it.
I think the point of me writing all this is to remind all of you there’s always a better feeling , better experience out there. I can dwell on a man disrespecting me or I can have experiences like the second one when they find my work interesting , innovative , unique , etc etc. and they recommend me to someone who may need help or they simply enjoy my blog posts. However it goes, I have passion for my work and helping other women heal.
I hope this little tea time was entertaining and helpful to all of you !
Currently I am working on more blog posts, and my schedule at work is changing, so more openings for sessions with me will be available! More details will come shortly, so make sure to follow on social media and keep a look our for emails !
Have a sweet night kittens XOXO
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